My dad has cancer. Should I go to college?

Question

My dad was recently diagnosed with lung cancer. It has spreader to the brain but that is all, not sure what stage.

Me and my family come from a low-income background.

I am a high school senior, and before my father's diagnosis, I already applied to colleges and did my FAFSA.

Throughout school, I have worked my butt off to get to where I am today. I am actively involved in community service, 3.9 GPA, and am already taking college classes as a high school student. However, I was not offered many scholarships, approx. zero. But I do have financial aid.

I am thinking about going to a state school, 2 hours away from where I live, as it would be cheap for my family.

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I am not sure how long my dad will live. I am very hesitant. I love him. And I don't think I show it that much or tell him. But I really want to stay here with him. I want to take care of him, as he does not know much english.

From statistics, I see that lung cancer patients only survive up to 5 years.
I will be going to college for 4 years but coming back for breaks and stuff.

This far into the college process, I cannot switch schools as financial aid would not be applied. I have had deep admiration for the school I was/am planning on going to, as it is a pretty top school and am guaranteed to get a job right out of college, instead of going to another poor repotted school where I live.

This was unexpected.
Chemo is very expensive.
My family is poor, almost near the poverty line.
I want an education. I want a future.
I know my parents want the best for me.
I don't know what I should do.

Please help me.

Answer 1

Call up the financial aid office, tell them what's going on with your family and see if they can offer more aid. You might also see if you can defer your enrollment for a year and start in the Fall of 2015. I suspect by that time you'll know where things stand a little better. That 5 year mark is what they considered as "cured." Hopefully he will beat it and exceed that mark. But I suspect you will know how he is doing within 9 months. Either way I think you should go if you can afford it. Two hours is close enough to be able to get home when you need to and far enough away where you can try to separate yourself a bit. I think you should try to defer enrollment because adjusting to your first semester is really hard without all this other stuff on your plate. But I really hope the outcome is good. As a parent, I would never want to hold my kid back and I'm sure your dad wants you to live your life fully.

Answer 2

This is a really hard decision for someone so young to have to make. You need to think about more than just yourself in this case, and by that I mean, what would your dad want for you, to stay in poverty but have you with him regularly or get a higher education and only see you occasionally? I was in a very similar situation not long ago, but with much less extreme circumstances, I chose to go to school and it worked out well for me and my family, so maybe I am biased. I think you should continue your schooling, work hard, and make your father proud, but do all the things you can with him when you can, while you can. (I don't know your heritage, but this is something you should really discuss in depth with your family, especially with your mother as she will be the one with him.) I hoped this helped, I am sorry about your dad, it will be rough, but modern medicine is getting better every day, don't give up hope!

Answer 3

I was fighting against a cancer stage 4.I think it is very important that family support to win, because i was very weak;really helped me participate in one group of affected by cancer, so my mood improved, also helped me a lot a medical adviser in advisercancer-diseases.com (they are doctors),this is important .I recomended not surrender, because sometimes the first treatment does not work as me, and sometimes change doctors it is necessary.Read positive thinking books gave me more energy.During my cancer,i changed my diet,now i eat vegetarian organic food(now i not eat meat).I think is a set of things that help.

Xoxo

Linda

Answer 4

Talk to them about it. See what they want, and what you want. It may sound dumb, but use the 'costs and benefits analysis thing. P.s. You could always continue your studies back at your 'homeland'. It does help with both the financial and health issues.

Answer 5

If his cancer has spread to his brain, it's stage 4. Maybe you should wait a little while..